More Job Talk

Sitting here with a weekend in front of me, with my legs tucked up underneath me, jamming to some new music on iTunes, drinking some tea....

I can't believe I have a job that I love. I mean I really truly cannot believe it. For so long this has evaded me. I can't remember the last time I had a job that I didn't come home crying from. Or at the very least hate. Well I do remember, I loved my Orthopedic Clinic job. Um, that ended in '04. Yeah, I have paid my dues. I am owed this. And in this economy I am not taking one second for granted. I might say I am tired, and I might not want to get up in the morning at first.. but I am human. I really do love it. *thinks how that just blows her mind that she said that*

I used to tell myself that they don't write books and direct movies and sing songs about jobs. All that is about love. Heartache. Friends. Family. Dreams. Love. I had all that was really and truly important. I used to console myself that I have had for 5 great years now what everyone wants, what everyone dreams of. Love. Not just that, but love that stories are written about. The kind of tale about how a maiden and a prince over-came trials and tribulations for years and years only because of their deep abiding yearning for each other, to be re-united in the end and because of their love they save the world and live in happiness to be 23948723947 years old. I still believe that. I don't approve of people who make work their life.. sacrificing time with family and friends... never taking their vacation days... working their life and soul away...because family and friends and love is most important. But there was always something missing. You have to have that other part too, to be able to live your life. It's just finding the balance between the two. Because you also can't not have it. So it's the best thing ever to finally have that other side. The work life. Something to be proud of.

My job is so cool and grown up. I freaked out the other day about my name being there at the bottom of two very important documents. "Prepared by: Kim Sanson, Document Specialist" on one and "Please sign and return to: Kim Sanson, Lien Release Processing". I mean, lawyers and county court judges and clients are going to see these papers, and see my name. Teehee!! I was so proud and everyone was laughing at me. Only people in New Jersey will see it though. I only do New Jersey. Don't ask me why. But I think it's cool. New Jersey is a bad ass. ;-) I also love how I have to use my badge to get into the front door, and then again to get into my department. If someone wants to come eat lunch with me in the cafeteria one day, they have to wait for me with the security guard at the front desk until I come get them, and then they can't leave my sight until they leave. I have to lock my computer and desk when I get up to go to the bathroom, and I can't leave any documents on my desk when I leave for the day. I feel like I'm working for the FBI sometimes! It's awesome.

I guess it was a good sign in the beginning that I could just be myself. Usually I am very hindered at work, I get very timid and shy and scared to do anything. Until a long while passes and I get to know everyone... but even then I stress out about everything. But from the first day of "class" I was very open and outspoken and making jokes and making everyone laugh. That's really how I am when I'm at my most comfortable and natural state. Everything just clicked. So everyone loves me in my department, we have alot of fun. :-)

And once again, it's about freaking time!! I deserve it! The odd thing is the hardest thing has been letting myself deserve it and letting myself be happy. I think alot of women have that problem for some reason. But it's ok I'm getting pretty good at it now. ;-)

Well I feel better now. I felt like for my sake I just had to do one more post update about my job. Since the last one was my first day. Now that I'm (mostly) settled into it. To get it all off my chest. *breathes deeply*

Now I'm off to enjoy my stay-up-late-Friday!